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Messages - |iR|Focalor

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it's not like if he took the time to post a REAL resume that was both TRUE and IMPRESSIVE that people still wouldn't call it bullshit.

The prophecy is fulfilled! :jesus:

Trouble Shooting / Re: Why I will never
« on: April 26, 2008, 10:31:20 AM »
I really don't think it could be the cable. I made sure to reconnect the exact same cables in the exact same slots they were in before taking it all apart. I labelled everything to make sure I connected it back the exact same way it was before removal. I'll try screwing the cable, but I doubt it'll fix anything.

poetry / essays / short stories? / Poetry and lyrics by Focalor
« on: April 25, 2008, 10:03:47 PM »
I have probably half of a bookshelf of notebooks full of things I've written over the years. Figured I'd share a little bit of it.

First, a poem I wrote probably 10 years ago.

Life Is Not Through
empty words
so absurd
promised lies
the mother dies
as the child sits and cries
what else is left
grief stricken and bereft
we all die the death
we all have a last breath
every day we have less
as the order reduces to mess
they teach that the reason for the season is the treason unconfessed
if emoluments for sin there be, I'll pay when due
but my life is not yet through
not how some have meant
to be content
they sit idle with nothing to do
not knowing their life is through

Another one I wrote maybe 8 or 9 years ago.

Princess of Hell (for M.R.S.)
Crystalized transparent dreams which bring you to me
from far stretched regions to this dim-lit fantasy
Candle wax glows and boils dripping slowly
Come deeper into the mind to dwell and know me
When curiosity is aroused and passions wax hot
the flame will ignite with white light in the spot
The spinning spiders softly gliding down the walls to your feet
The once shining light flees and runs in retreat
If I dug a little deeper, I wonder what I'd find
What mysteries and secrets would be hidden in your mind?
What was it that created you, what is it that makes you real?
If I only knew how to touch you and what you like to feel
You intrigue my thoughts and captivate my senses
For all eternity, you will be my Princess.

I've been working on some new music recently. I've begun writing and recording the music for this one, but haven't added the lyrics yet. Here's the lyrics I've written for it.

When I was a child, I was instructed not to break
the rules that were laid out for me, accept it all on faith
Never question at the core and never have a doubt
Swallow what you're fed and don't you ever spit it out
Growing sick from medicine that I was told would cure
everything that's wrong with me that isn't whole and pure
What the hell is going on, is this some kind of joke?
Smiling, laughing, praising God as I slowly choke

The line
It must be crossed / now and then / rules are tossed / aside again
In time
It all gets blurred / what I see / final words / dead to me

Panging my conscience, it is driving me mad
Wondering if what it was... was what I always had
Lost within a maze of specious promises and lies
Gazing at it set before me with my widened eyes
I cannot believe I let you pull me into this
Faith was gone by sunrise and was betrayed by a kiss
Dig for meaning, dig for hope, you won't like what you find
Just twist it like you always did the knife stabbed in my mind

The line
It must be crossed / now and then / rules are tossed / aside again
In time
It all gets blurred / what I see / final words / dead to me

One more set of lyrics. I haven't written any music for these yet.

Time Is The Test
Time will test your resolve / and tempt you to stray from the path
Obstacles sighted are many / and threaten to steal all you have
You gaze in the mirror to find / you're not quite as strong as you thought
Discovering you are the foe / in all of the wars which you've fought
Examine these motives which move / and I promise that you will find
The fear that once ruled your actions / is what you must now leave behind
Battered by waves of the past / as you lie on the shores of regret
Learn to forgive your mistakes / and know that you'll never forget
that pain is a gift you were granted / a gift that has taught us so much
Though memories sometime bring sorrow, / your memories, no man can touch

/dev/random / THE END OF THE (internet) WORLD!!! OH NOES!
« on: April 25, 2008, 09:25:03 PM »
Yepperooni! According to AT&T, the internet will DIE in 2010!

I'm gonna have to toss out my bullshit card on this one. Decades ago with the anti-trust laws, the government forced AT&T to split up. In recent years, they've managed to buy back all their sub-companies and are now once again THE communications entity. Seems to me like they're offering up a shiny silver platter adorned with liberal amounts of bullshit and garnish in an attempt to "pre-bullshit" us all into blindly accepting a large increase in communications costs. I'm not sure yet, but that's what it smells like to me.

1v1 and TDM Demos / Re: metal plays quake?!? tdm
« on: April 25, 2008, 08:31:29 PM »
Ah, Miller Lite! Beer flavored water!

At least it's not Pabst Blue Ribbon.

I'm assuming the guy that actually gave that beer a blue ribbon for excellence was the same redneck that got his nipple AND his tongue bitten off by a beaver.

Quake / Re: Back From The Dead
« on: April 25, 2008, 08:23:40 PM »
Quote from: X'tyfe on April 25, 2008, 12:46:04 PM
Quote from: X'tyfe on April 25, 2008, 12:46:04 PM

indeed. thats why i never could figure out his place in EoM
but surely theres a reason

I picked EoM, EoM didn't pick me. It appeared to me as though EoM had almost no active members. I wanted to join a clan that needed a positive pro-active member to help take the reins and keep it alive and growing. That is the position in a clan I wanted, and that is the position in a clan I have taken. Here recently I haven't done much for recruiting. I don't anticipate being as much of a presence this summer either, too much other stuff to do. My 3 acres of property isn't emo, it isn't going to cut itself. ...All with a push mower, try to contain your jealousy.  :grass:

poetry / essays / short stories? / Re: Quotes
« on: April 25, 2008, 06:14:51 PM »
Aaaaaaahhhhh OooooooAh o ah oahhhh aaaaahhhhh ah ah oooooooooo

                                                          -- Jenna Jameson

Actually, her mouth was full. That was the OTHER chick in the movie.

Quake / Re: Back From The Dead
« on: April 25, 2008, 11:17:18 AM »
Quote from: X'tyfe on April 24, 2008, 04:34:58 PM
Quote from: X'tyfe on April 24, 2008, 04:34:58 PM
Focalor, its unfortunate that you would never become the leader of EoM
i believe it would gain a lot of the respect it has lost, with you at the helm

Actually, I'm co-leader. Vibes will always be the "unofficial" leader no matter what for as long as he remains an active player. He's been in the clan and active the longest, it's only fair, and as you gave your opinions about being overlooked by clan mates with more favor being given to newer members, I'm sure you understand why I feel that way. As time goes on and our membership grows, it's becoming more and more apparent that my clan probably needs to consider revising a few policies and tightening up on a few rules in order to make things run smoother.

But respect re-shmeckt, hehe. Trust me, I do my part from time to time to piss people off. I don't go out of my way to FIND people to screw with, but I usually don't simply ignore those looking for a e-fight like I probably should. Turning the other cheek has never been part of my philosophy. Furthermore, I don't really worry about the opinions of those who would judge an entire group of folks based on one individual. Vibes seems to be a lot more impulsive with his words than me, and I've noticed a few times where he meant to say one thing and it came across COMPLETELY the wrong way. Actions cause reactions, it's every individuals sole responsibility to take responsibility for what they say and how those statements might color the judgement of others concerning them. I can't always defend what he says, it's his job to make sure people know what he's saying. That's why I try to proof read everything I type and then read it back to myself to make sure I'm conveying the message I intended to the reader. If someone doesn't like me, ehh, oh well. Not my cross to bear.

Jokes / Re: Limericks
« on: April 24, 2008, 08:38:52 PM »
There once was a man from nantucket   :evilgrin:

There once was a man from Nantucket
...finish the rest? FUCK IT!

Trouble Shooting / Re: Why I will never
« on: April 24, 2008, 04:23:30 PM »
Speaking of which....

Probably a month ago, I broke my old system down piece by piece and cleaned the 10 year old dust out of it. I put everything back in the same way, same cable connections, I'm mean EVERYTHING. When I started it back up, the floppy drive won't work anymore. The BIOS was set to check the floppy drive for a boot disk first before starting up. I had to go into the BIOS and disable boot from floppy on startup, otherwise I'd have to hit f1 to skip it. I don't think the drive is completely toast, the light on the drive is ALWAYS on now even though it won't read from it. Any suggestions anyone?

Quake / Re: Back From The Dead
« on: April 24, 2008, 04:10:35 PM »

Well hopefully you have had time to sit in a nice lawn chair by the lake and watch the sunset reflecting off the water as you think to yourself, "Life is good, and Quake2 is just a game." When life and Quake2 merge into the same slot on your own mental ladder of importance, it's time to drop everything and do something else.

In my opinion, most of what you wrote is absolutely no one's business. Fuck people. They don't really deserve to know your inner most thoughts. But I do agree with your attitude you've taken for future dealings here. Screw it, just have fun. Let the dicks be dicks and don't allow them to ruin your moments of gratification and indulgence. They're basically black holes anyway, the only joy they receive is in sucking others into their game of creating strife, misery, and conflict where it is not needed.

Welcome back.

Jokes / Re: Joke :)
« on: April 24, 2008, 03:46:26 PM »
Q: What do doctors do with the circumsized foreskin of babies penises?

A: Sell it to fags as chewing gum.

Jokes / Re: Limericks
« on: April 24, 2008, 03:44:24 PM »
There once was a tiny girl in my vestibule
who wasn't quite a big as the rest of you
When she needed a ride
in my underwear she'd hide
and swing from the hair on my testicule

#1 1v1 Quake 2 Tournament (1998)
#1 Top of the Zone Clan Wars (KGB-1998)
#2 2v2 Quake 2 Tournament (krez, flock - lost to blister and finatics-1998)
#1 Top of the Zone Clan Wars (oV-1999)
#1 1v1 Quake 2 Tournament (1999)
#1 OGL Quake 2 Team Deathmatch 4v4 Ladder (i0-2001)
#1 OGL Quake 2 Team Deathmatch 4v4 Ladder (MaD-2002)
#1 OGL Quake 2 Team Rocket Arena 4v4 Ladder (MaD-2002)
#1 First Frag Quake 2 4v4 TDM Tournament (MaD-2002)
#2 NADML Quake 2 4v4 TDM Tournament (underground-2005)
#1 NADML Quake 2 4v4 TDM Tournament (FoJ-2006)
#1 OGL Quake 2 Team Rocket Arena 4v4 Ladder (Feared-2007)
#1 NAiL Quake2 Team Instagib 3v3 (Devine-2008)

my e-penisis 14 inches long.

This is a cool accomplishment. However, it means nothing other than you have no life. Anyone who has that much time to play this game undoubtedly is a loser in real life. I'd love to see what his resume says. Hey Krez, have you graduated from fries yet or are you still mopping floors? LOL! 

lame attempt at an insult and poor insight into gamers --imo-- first off i think playing q2 is a great facet to my life,   and i would bet that Krez was better than you are today the second week he played ---in my experience almost all of the greatest players are born naturally better ( hand-eye coordination, three dimensional relationship perception, problem solving, etc --like the eyesight of a great baseball hitter) and he probably is very well off since he has the time to play and most likely a high end computer to do it on.  The fact that he is an insufferable immature pain in the ass ( another thing he outdoes you on) neither  diminishes his skill or accomplishments in the game nor does it reflect on his personal life --only garners him less respect which he obviously does not seek.

I concur, doctor., but doesn't necessarily mean he's in fact well off or has an impressive resume in real life. But for fuck's sake, this is the internet, it's not like if he took the time to post a REAL resume that was both TRUE and IMPRESSIVE that people still wouldn't call it bullshit.

Trouble Shooting / Re: Why I will never
« on: April 22, 2008, 06:48:08 PM »
The old lungs work pretty good too.

I tried that, but the lung tissue broke up, started bleeding, and got stuck between the keys. Then I had to find something else to clean up the lung chunks.  :bigshades:

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