Author Topic: The last movie you saw.... (Read 567614 times)

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1650 on:** February 26, 2018, 07:33:25 AM »

Never heard of "jewish lightning" before. I've heard of a jewish canoe.

haunted · « **Reply #1651 on:** February 26, 2018, 10:53:08 AM »

Can't believe you've never heard of jewish lightning. I heard it for the first time when I was 8 years old

itsjoya · « **Reply #1652 on:** February 28, 2018, 06:06:15 PM »

The Greatest Showman, this musical is so good I don't know why it didn't become a blockbuster film.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1653 on:** March 02, 2018, 08:27:16 PM »

The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat the fuck did I just watch? Starring Colin Farrel, Nicole Kidman, and some retarded looking teenage boy. I swear to christ, this was probably the most uncomfortable to watch movie I've ever seen. 98% of the dialogue delivered throughout the movie is done stoic and blank and emotionless like everyone has fucking autism. They sound like 6th graders reading the script aloud in literature class, like they're fucking bored to be a part of such a bad movie. And the dialogue in and of itself is absolutely AWFUL. So unrealistic and shitty.

Actual dialogue from the movie:
(Doctor at a barbeque at a friend/coworkers house, he and coworker/friend are chatting)
"How have you been?"
"Fine. Things are going really well. My daughter just got her first period."

[record scratch]
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!?! Yeah. Like that. The dialogue itself is written just as bad as it's delivered.

And yet, I had to watch it all the way to the end. I won't attribute that to the buildup of suspense and the desire to know how it ends, although that was a minor factor, but mostly it was just the fact that I hate to start something and not finish it, even a terrible movie.

Do yourself a favor, don't rent this one. Wait for it to come on a premium channel or stream it as part of a 10 dollar monthly Netflix kinda thing. And even then, prepare to find something else to watch. It takes willpower to sit through this motherfucker.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1654 on:** March 02, 2018, 08:44:04 PM »

Oh yeah. Speaking of weird as fuck movies...

Mother

HOLY SHIT. It starts off kinda normal. But it ends like a fucking nuclear meltdown bad acid trip from Satan's asshole. Is that a strange description? Because I guarantee you the ending is a billion times stranger than any description I could give you. "Bad acid trip" is really the key to it though. The ending makes NO FUCKING SENSE whatsoever. But then again, it's so god damned fucking weird, that it's kinda refreshing to see a movie that goes totally fucking bonkers like an unmanned firehose. It's an artsy kinda psychological kinda movie, but not douchey or puke-worthy or up it's own ass.

I'd give it maybe a 7 out of 10.

Now if Jigsaw wasn't demented or awful enough for you, give this one a shot...

The Belko Experiment.

It's like Office Space meets Hostel meets Saw. Nothing Oscar-worthy, but definitely gruesome and fun... if you're a twisted kinda fuck like me. Basically if you liked Hostel a lot, you'll like this one too.

7/10

yahoo · « **Reply #1655 on:** March 06, 2018, 06:16:54 PM »

127 Hours (2010)

7/10

if you go canyoneering better be be safe. I think this is based on a true story.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1656 on:** March 07, 2018, 09:16:12 AM »

Here's one with Haunted's mistress in it

The Circle (2017) - shit/10

AWFUL! TERRIBLE! Why does Tom Hanks keep doing these shitty movies? This one's worse than those crappy DaVinci Code movies he does. It's fucking stupid! This movie makes no sense!

The Foreigner (2017)

When I heard Jackie Chan was costarring along side Pierce Brosnan, I thought... this'll be fuckin awful as usual. But it wasn't your usual slapstick dopey Jackie Chan movie. The movie involves IRA bombing, which is kinda... shitty for a plot, honestly. A little unimaginative, and downright fucking WRONG since technically the conflict is over now. It's like if you ask people what Ireland's about, they always say "Alcoholism, the color green, leprechauns, St. Patricks Day (MORE alcoholism), and IRA bombings." At this point when everyone's being so god damned ultra-PC, why is no one calling shenanigans on the Irish and IRA bombing stereotype? (Sons of Anarchy tv series used the IRA storyline for their gun dealing shit too, zzzzz) But... screenplay writers gotta write their shit for their audience. And since most people are idiots and make those cliche stereotypical connections on their own, I suppose they gotta support that with their poorly imagined plot lines. Meanwhile, this movie was based on a book called "The Chinaman", and in the movie, several characters even refer to Chan's character as "the chinaman". But because people have deemed that word to be as racist as "n*gger", obviously they gotta the change the movie title to something that makes almost no fucking sense. The bombings take place in England. Chans character is from China, Brosnan's character is from Ireland (a brit playing an irishman... mmm hmm), so wouldn't they BOTH be "Foreigner"?

Meh, anyway. In spite of all that, it's still actually a pretty good movie.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1657 on:** April 07, 2018, 08:10:35 AM »

Annihilation - starring Natalie Portman, Jennifer Jason Leigh, others.

WHOA! Do yourself a favor. Take a fair amount of some kind of psychedelic substance, preferably mushrooms, and SEE THIS MOVIE. Holy shit balls. Some of the trippiest special effects I've ever seen.

Loved it. One of the most interesting movies I've seen in a long long time. Mostly sci-fi, part mystery/suspense, part horror. It's great. Weird as hell at times, but great.

yahoo · « **Reply #1658 on:** April 19, 2018, 08:23:30 AM »

Pacific Rim - Uprising

?/10

IDK. Storyline was so cheesy even at the start.. The CG was good. cant say if I enjoyed it or not but did managed to finish it.

Would recommend watching it IF its free. Paid -- don't know

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1659 on:** April 27, 2018, 05:11:43 PM »

Scorched Earth - Starring Gina Carano and... that wonky eyed dude who played Batiatus in the Spartacus series.

DEAR GOD LORD OF THE LITTLE BABIES, WHY THE FUCK DO I KEEP WATCHING MOVIES WITH GINA CARANO! Seriously, Steven Seagal is a WAY better fucking actor, and he's TERRIBLE. It's like a futuristic apocalyptic western. It's just SO BAD. An hour and a half of my life I'll never get back.

yahoo · « **Reply #1660 on:** May 12, 2018, 09:08:53 PM »

Ready Player One

7/10

Not bad. Would appeal to nerdy audience but also to mainstream. Its about a VR gaming universe thing.

yahoo · « **Reply #1661 on:** June 02, 2018, 08:07:22 PM »

TOMB RAIDER 2018

6/10

There are several gaps and non sensible flow of the story but I kinda like this one as compared to the cartoonish Angelina Jolie version.

Its a batman 90's movie vs. the Nolan batman thingy.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1662 on:** June 04, 2018, 04:41:14 PM »

I didn't see it. She wasn't naked in it, so... That's right Hollywood. I WON'T WATCH SHIT UNLESS THERE IS GRATUITOUS SEX AND NUDITY IN IT. So make sure you faggits remember that when the last season of Game of Thrones comes out. I want at least 30 minutes of penises, pussy hair, and saggy titties this season, otherwise it won't be quality television.

Fucked up thing is that as much as I joke about it, apparently that's precisely the opinion some people have that spurs them to include so much needless nudity. Where do we go from here? What's next? Nudity on cereal boxes at the grocery store? Don't forget to get little Timmy some Puffy Nipple-O's! And why god why are their titties on my can of Folgers medium roast? You don't even wanna know what they're putting on the boxes of Tampax, holy shit. Is that a crime scene photo!?! Jesus.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1663 on:** June 13, 2018, 02:36:17 PM »

Been down with back problems so I've had plenty of time to watch movies lately. Some ones worth remarking on...

Revenge (2018)
Starring... a few people I've never heard of. It's a foreign film, I guess. Half of it was in Canadian French or something I'm not familiar with, but it IS subtitled in English. Has several scenes of exaggerated gore which I liked, almost rivaling a few Tarantino movies for blood quantity. It's not really "great", but it is kinda entertaining. One dude has his cutesy mistress come to his fancy desert hunting retreat house, his other two friends show up for a hunting trip, some shit goes down, she runs to the desert to escape them, but then begins hunting THEM herself. Kinda like the title implies, it's about revenge.

Death Wish (2018)
Supposed to be a retelling of the old Charles Bronson classic franchise of films. But from what I remember of the Charles Bronson Death Wish movie, it's almost a completely new story. The only similarity is that someone kills his family and he goes out looking to find them. Not horrible though. I kinda liked it. Worth a watch.

The Outsider (2018)
Starring Jared Leto and bunch of Japanese folks I don't think I've seen before. It's about a white guy who hooks up with Yakuza guy in a Japanese prison and then becomes part of the Osaka Yakuza himself in post-WW2 Japan. AWESOME movie. Loved it. Great story, great acting, great overall feel. I've seen plenty of other movies that portray Japanese Yakuza and most of them feel very hokey and fictional. This one treated it properly and realistically. Kinda like a "Godfather" type of movie. VERY VERY good. Only problem was it didn't come with subtitles. Most of the movie features Japanese dialogue, and even though I had NO FUCKING IDEA what they were saying most of the time (other than "gaijin" which I know means "white guy" or "foreigner"), I still loved it. I did manage to find a separate SRT subtitle file, so I'm gonna reconvert the file with subtitles hardcoded to the MP4 and watch it again. Usually I would have NO interest in watching a movie again so soon after seeing it already, but this ones so good, I don't mind. Seriously, SEE THE DAMN THING.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #1664 on:** July 02, 2018, 10:37:33 AM »

Bill Hicks - Revelations (1993)

I'm a kinda big fan of standup comedy specials, have been ever since I was younger. I remember back when Comedy Central first started up back in the early 90's and they had lots of shows with standup clips.

Kinda weird going back now and watching those same comedians who I used to like. Even more recent ones like Dane Cook. Back in probably 2003, I thought he was hilarious. I watch those same standup routines now and go... "Why did I ever laugh at this guy?"

Case in point... and some other comedy fans might wanna stone me to death for this... Bill Hicks.

Ran across the old 1993 Bill Hicks special titled "Revelations". I was never a HUGE Bill Hicks fan to begin with, but I always thought he was marginally funny. UGH! It was awful. And now that I think about it, most of the shit I've ever heard Bill Hicks do is just as bad. He's really not a comedian. He was more like just a professional ranting asshole.

...Kinda like Doug Stanhope, honestly. I like Doug Stanhope, I have most of his specials, he does make me laugh, but honestly most of his routines are just whining and bitching and pontificating and ranting like an asshole. (or like a DRUNK asshole)

Anyway, not afraid to say it: Bill Hicks was not a comedy genius. Bill Cosby was funnier... even when he was raping.

Watch it here if you wanna. Just make sure you have adblock or something similar. This site will molest you with popups otherwise.

https://www6.fmovies.se/film/bill-hicks-revelations.oj8oz/k94w46

Author Topic: The last movie you saw.... (Read 567614 times)

El Box de Shoutamente