The funny shit you saw in ts-live thread

[|iR|Focalor]

<+Spawny> Razor enters to the chat of my website and insult me and insult arch all day...
<+|iR|Focalor> because he's ashamed of his virginity
<+Spawny> clearly is not working and has plenty of free time
<+|iR|Focalor> he takes it out on random females
<+Spawny> yea
<+Spawny> pour idiot
<+|iR|Focalor> idiots are pourable?
<+|iR|Focalor> do they come in cans or bottles?
<+|iR|Focalor> I like my idiots on tap

[quadz]

I suppose this sort of counts as 'funny'

On the DM server...

[2009-07-18 Sat 00:04:06] YNOT: fuck tasty splenn they are a joke like this server
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:07:59] YNOT: i will be glad when this shit server is gone in two weeks
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:13] [EoM]sohtelo: what?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:16] ohbaby!!!: it will?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:27] [EoM]sohtelo: will it?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:44] YNOT: yes i files alwsuit against them thursday in wichita falls texas
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:58] ohbaby!!!: silly
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:08:59] [EoM]sohtelo: whaaaa
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:09:08] [EoM]sohtelo: whaat?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:09:11] [EoM]sohtelo: why????
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:09:44] [EoM]sohtelo: why a lawsuit?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:09:47] YNOT:  to stop all the fake as cheats and bullshit to make it more equal to everyone
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:10:20] [EoM]sohtelo: how do you know its going down in two weeks?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:10:44] YNOT: im sure they will shit when they get it but oh fuckn well they allow the cheats now they will deal with it
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:11:11] [EoM]sohtelo: dang
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:11:33] YNOT: he cheats suck here the mods do nothing what do you expect
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:11:41] [EoM]sohtelo: well
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:12:13] [EoM]sohtelo: I hope not, this is after all the only fun I can have after a long days work of school and part time jobs. TS has been there for all tho
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:12:22] YNOT: cause i filed the lawsuit myself in my name
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:12:29] [EoM]sohtelo: the shoot em ups.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:12:36] [EoM]sohtelo: dang
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:13:21] [EoM]sohtelo: hmm
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:13:21] [EoM]sohtelo: hmm
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:13:53] [EoM]sohtelo: ur in texas right? where is the server exactly located?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:13:59] YNOT: dallas
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:02] ANDROID: im not but the server is
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:18] [EoM]sohtelo: oh
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:24] [EoM]sohtelo: wait, where are you android?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:30] ANDROID: wisconsin
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:33] [EoM]sohtelo: ohh
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:14:53] YNOT: i am 100 miles from dallas man the mods do nothing dont care what so ever so lets make i far for everyone is all i ask
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:12] ANDROID: 22 ping is something
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:13] [EoM]sohtelo: yeah, well...could always do a force anticheat or something.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:19] [EoM]sohtelo: yeah I know.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:22] [EoM]sohtelo: 22 ping?
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:24] [EoM]sohtelo: LOL
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:31] ANDROID: ynot has 22 ping
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:36] [EoM]sohtelo: yeah i know
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:39] ANDROID: cause hes close to server
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:42] [EoM]sohtelo: 100 miles wouldn't make sense
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:50] [EoM]sohtelo: Deathstalker is in texas
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:52] [EoM]sohtelo: with a 12 ping.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:55] ANDROID: sweet
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:15:57] YNOT: i agree android but at the same time people cheat like mofo i have no prbs with them equalling my ping to youres or the lowest one in the game
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:14] [EoM]sohtelo: dang
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:18] [EoM]sohtelo: well then
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:27] [EoM]sohtelo: I guess I'll have to find a NEW hobby now.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:28] [EoM]sohtelo: :(
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:29] [EoM]sohtelo: LOL
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:30] YNOT: well death is prob in dallas
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:32] ANDROID: i dont cheat...i may quad whore if someone else is hogging it
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:50] [EoM]sohtelo: yeah he probably is.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:16:57] [EoM]sohtelo: And I know, some people do quad whore.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:04] ANDROID: i got r1q2 with anticheat...
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:09] YNOT: ok androis explain this to me ive been playing you for years man how the hell do they come in with rail and rocket
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:12] [EoM]sohtelo: My computer
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:14] [EoM]sohtelo: can't load the
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:15] [EoM]sohtelo: AC
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:20] [EoM]sohtelo: it messes up
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:25] [EoM]sohtelo: if not i would have it enabled
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:28] ANDROID: who is they.....
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:17:28] [EoM]sohtelo: And I never cheat.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:18:06] ANDROID: hey shoot rockets while running....and weapon switch to rail and both can land simultaneously
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:18:27] YNOT: no im talking right when they respawn android
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:18:35] YNOT: bam rocket or rail
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:18:37] ANDROID: but who does that
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:18:40] [EoM]sohtelo: but it takes time to change weapons and in mid air? iono that seems kinda fishy
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:11] [EoM]sohtelo: oh well iono about that.
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:12] YNOT: well u may not see it but im gonna tell you with 22 ping and the fastes comp you can buy i c it
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:21] [EoM]sohtelo: hm
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:23] ANDROID: a lot of people send rockets to clear a corner
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:34] ANDROID: while strafe running to it
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:40] ANDROID: with rail in hand or chain
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:19:53] ANDROID: spec me
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:20:07] YNOT: im talking like right after they have been killed man respawn im railed no thats messed up and im on top of the line shit here man
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:20:40] [EoM]sohtelo: goto
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:22:41] YNOT: im gonna tell ya android if this was real life i seriously would need a fucking tank for you
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:23:02] [EoM]sohtelo: haha
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:23:17] ANDROID: [ROCKET PACK] Dropped
[2009-07-18 Sat 00:23:25] [EoM]sohtelo: oh well man, hope this settles positively.

Then later on IRC...

[16:59:25] <[EoM]sohtelo> Is that true that tastyspleen has a lawsuit? Was hearing about it from some guy on the DM server last nigh/this morning.
[16:59:34] <[EoM]sohtelo> *night
[16:59:37] <[BTF]Dizzy> no idea
[16:59:42] <[BTF]Dizzy> hey soh :)
[17:00:01] <[EoM]sohtelo> hey diz :)
[17:04:11] <[EoM]sohtelo> hmm oh well. guess quadz will mention something on the forums if the lawsuit does pass.
[17:04:12] <[EoM]sohtelo> peace

[UUD-40]

rofl

Of course its true, someone said it on the internet.

[playboy]

i think sohtelo is more retarded than razor, the impossible has became possible.

[Sgt. Dick]

I need to offer him a money making opportunity, just need a small investment from him. 

[|iR|Focalor]

 

Even if what he said WERE true and EVERY SINGLE LAST PLAYER at Tastyspleen were cheating with 3 aimbots at once, this little retarded fuck stick wouldn't be able to do a damn thing about it legally. I believe Congress has more important shit to deal with concerning the economic recession and the war in Afghanistan than people supposedly using hacks on a Quake2 community of servers.

I say permanently ban the schmuck from the servers, mirc channel, and the forums since he evidently has such a problem with Tastyspleen.

[Slick Lawyer]

No, it's true. Our firm is currently seeking an immediate cease and desist of service order from the Supreme Court of Texas. After that is served to the party responsible for providing connectivity to the servers, we will subpoena Quadz to appear in civil court where we will seek unspecified monetary damages for the emotional pain and suffering which all of the cheaters at Tastyspleen have inflicted upon my client.

[Sgt. Dick]

  ARE YOU SERIOUS, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO. 

j/k my name isn't sohtelo 

[|iR|Focalor]

This excludes Focalor...

You're still a retarded fuck stick for saying that. But at least you have impeccable taste.

[playboy]

[14:12] <uvula> (tourney4) Reflex: invite! it's ok,  Ah! left
[14:12] <uvula> (tourney4) (WallFly[BZZZ]): SENT: Reflex INVITES YOU TO GOTO TOURNEY4 - it~s ok,  Ah! left

[[BTF] Reflex]

Didn't work either

[playboy]

saying ah! in quake2 is like saying bomb on an airplane!

[UUD-40]

[21:21:54] <uvula> (vanilla) Tubby: I, Tyrone, am / am not a virgin
[21:22:03] <uvula> (vanilla) ty: well for starters my name is not tyrone, so that would be a silly thing to write
[21:22:05] <uvula> (vanilla) Tubby: (delete as appropriate)
[21:22:21] <uvula> (vanilla) Tubby: ok
[21:22:45] <uvula> (vanilla) Tubby: Then write
[21:22:47] <uvula> (vanilla) Tubby: 'I, Ty, am / am not a virgin'
[21:22:51] <uvula> (vanilla) ty: listen, i don't ask you questions all day


 

[[BTF] Reflex]

Old quotes I was saving,   Ridix telling people to goto tastyspleen.com was funny

But this first one takes the cake.

* ShadowKiller: Scrotumus stop touching ur Balls
* Scrotumus: oh, sorry, was trying to stroke your chin

* Knife Butterfly: persistance is futile....

* Los: isnt machine gun better then chain?

* Kold: I have 2 inch fucking pubes, my sperm is white

* Bitchy Boo: may it rain mushrooms on your head

* aR|Confuzed: gotta have a pep talk with my ping

* zhc: you are both female?

* {SX}Mandingo: you're got issues din

* Riley: Kobra's like the yoda of q2

* [BTF]MangyMutt: This map has "issues"

* My Documents: Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control.

* [A2W]HEMROYD: that were dumb

* aR|PhyziK: let me smoke my fuckin crack rock

* My Documents: Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.

* VGA|AcidBrainn: dude i only eat the crust

* nocent hell: someone used cat litter instead of ram

* Buttmunch: note to self . . . get more ammo


* melissa: I've never been railed like that

* |D|daelmun: another reason why us servers are nice, noone speaks polish

* DeathInc{KEA}: KILL!!! KILL!!! KILL!!!

* morto : you should always frag

* Zir Blazer: Getting girls that plays Q2 isn-t an easy task

* (gg software): picking up chicks near the blue Rocket Launcher

* napalm: im going to go cut myself

* Sjay: who wants fresh pineapple?!

* [420]Bongers: u smoke herb?

* Ax2Grind: normal and toxic shouldnt be in the same sentence

* squonkamatic: Kind of hard to miss with one of those things, isn't it?

* bullet_sandwich: running fer the hills haahhahaha

* Kurapica: sigh, why aren't there any DM servers anymore
* mE?: I dunno - why aren't there any 8-track players

* ShaQ: what is ODB?

* eggytoast: playing q2 causes your breasts to shrink

* Solarnaut: I'd never invade your personal space

* Schm0tZ: lol im gettin my ass kicked by a hunk of sirloin?

* Schm0tZ: brb phone, dont kill me

* Ax2Grind: i will shoot anyone voting for winterjump

* s.RuTHoX: man this game makes me crazy !!

* eggytoast: the wind tunnels in quake 1 were inspired by the wafts of tink eminating from john romeros crotch

* MaxMoo_Wahoo: Moo Moo Mek Mek MOO mek mek!

* [BTF]DeathStlkr: he put sandpaper around his pecker and went to it

* Major Havoc: shut mouth play game

* Odysseus: stick to hockey and leave the quakin to the real men

* PrmaNewB-TOAST!: I shall fear no evil, For I AM the BADDEST Bunny in the VALLEY!!

* PrmaNewB-TOAST!: If You Can't Die with Dignity, Die ANYWAY!!

* PrmaNewB-TOAST!: Darn, I thought that was WATER!

* ~Cochise: u cant fool god

* wowsa: i hacked ur moms calculator

* Green Screen: im a homicidal black man trapped in a leggo

* [TC]RiDiX: tastyspleen.com clowns

* [BTF]DiscoDitto: Suck It Dowm..Baby..Pleasure All Mine....HaHhahahaha!

* Edm-Dude(BOD): The game was a winner, but VODKA is the real hit, tonight!!!

[fdrjk]

<uvula> 3(play) Razor: Im thinking about and 4bot3 on IRTDM someday
<uvula> 3(play) c4r!s: omg
<uvula> 3(play) Razor: They r faggots (bundles of sticks), so i will show them my 4hax3, rofl
<uvula> 3(play) Razor: I hope FRKQ2 can connect
<uvula> 3(play) Razor: I hate faggots (bundles of sticks), it will be total frk rape, rofl
<uvula> 7(play) console: hi
<uvula> 3(play) Razor: I will jsut find out how to use it with a proxy, but i will have to downlaod it again
<uvula> 3(play) Razor: hi