Lyrics

[themuffinman]

And heres a poem i made

Oh Smelly Cornholio
You Fag You Fag
Oh Smelly Cornholio
With your big, man bags.

Corny Corny
With Men He's Horny
Omega, Tak.
By God He's A Spac!

Joking dannyboy

ROFL!!! Stay AWAY from writing poetry, bitch! 

[[BTF]adam]

But it was awesome!

[themuffinman]

But it was awesome!

No ... no it wasn't!

[Om3ga]

that was gay!   

[[BTF]adam]

so are you.

[Om3ga]

so are you.

*pulls out the (O)"mega phone"*

[[BTF]adam]

I know Yer still gay!

[[BTF]n0ctuary]

Here are the lyrics to the entire album Howard Is Bald, by anal cunt. The following lyrics are more profound than anything else being said on this thread, so pay attention.

1. Howard Is Bald

Howard is Bald [2x]

YIIIIEEEEEEEEE

Howard is Bald! - BALD BALD BALD B-A-L
Howard is Bald! - BALD
Bald, he's bald
Howard is Bald!
Howard is bald [7x]
Howard is bald, bald
Howard is bald [2x]
Howard is bald, bald BAAAAAAAALLLLLLDDDD!!!!
Howard is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaald

YIIIIIIEEEEEEEE

Howard is bald - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA
Howard is bald [3x]
Howard is bald, bald, bald, bald, HOWARD IS BALD!

Howard is bald
I'm telling ya, he's got no fucking hair
B-A-L-D, Howard is bald [2x]

Howard is bald! - BALD BALD BALD B-A-L
Howard is bald! - BALD

Bald to the bone [2x]
I'm telling you baby - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

Howard is bald [2x]
Bald [3x]
Howard is baaaaaaaald [5x]


2. Bald To The Bone

I know this guy named Howard,
and he's bald.
And he's got a goatie,
but not on his head.
He's a really bald guy,
bald as bald can get.
And I will tell ya, Howard Wulkan,
is bald to the bone.
B-b-b-b-b-b-b bald,
b-b-b-b-b bald,
b-b-b-b-b-b bald.
Bald to the bone.


3. A Conversation With Howard Wulkan

Hey Tim, lets go talk to Howard.
Yeah that's a good idea.

Hey Howard, how are you doing?
Yeah Howard.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHHHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHHA
You guys are crazy man!

Hey Howard, i was breathing oxigen today.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Howard, i was wondering if you had like, that Napalm Death album?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Oh, you guys are insane!
You guys are crazy!

Hey Howard, I was walking on the sidewalk today.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hey Howard, I was wondering, you know like,
you like have a pencil or something?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


4. Ballad Of Baldness

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Howard Wulkan is bald.

He's got no hair on his head,
because he's bald.


5. Howard Wulkan Is Bald (Acoustic & Jazz Versions)

I know this guy named Howard.
HE'S FUCKING BALD!


6. Night On Bald Moutain

Howard Wulkan [5x]
B-A-L-D BALD! (start on 3th time of above)

Howard Wulkan [5x]
B-A-L-D BALD! (start on 3th time of above)

Howard Wulkan [2x]

Howard Wulkin's bald, he's bald.
Howard is bald.
Howard is bald, BALD, BALD!


7. You Should Be Balding

Hey who's that bald guy walking down the street?
It's Howard.
Ow yeah!

His name is Howard Wulkan, yeah-yeah.
And his head's really shiny, yeah.
If he is only balding,
he's balding really bad, yeah-yeah.

Howard Wulkan's bald, yeah.
BAAAAAAAAAAAALD.
Howard Wulkan's bald, yeah, BALD BALD BALD BALD.

You should be balding, yeah. [2x]


8. If I Can't Have Hair

If I can't have hair, I don't want no rubbing baby. (not sure about rubbing)
If I can't have hair, AHA-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, NOOOO.

If I can't have hair, I don't want no implants baby.
If I can't have hair, AHA-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, YEAH!


9. Howard Wulkan (Wesley Willis Version)

I know this guy named Howard Wulkan,
he is really bald.
He has no hair on his head,
that's because he's bald.

Howard Wulkan [4x]

He be working at .......... (inaudible)
He used to work some place else.
He looks like that guy from ..........
and he's bald.

Howard Wulkan [4x]

That man is really bald,
He looks like ..........
He could really shave his head off.
ROCK ON BROTHER!

Howard Wulkan [4x]

.............
I'm not only the hairclub president,
I'm also client

[[BTF]adam]

Oh my gosh... whats it about? lol.

[[BTF]n0ctuary]

HOWARD IS BALD!

BALD!
BALD!
BALD!














bald.

[Bleach]

roffle  ive seen anal cunt 6 times now.. such a good time (the obscenity-fest or whatever its called is comming up mid oct, anal cunt is headlineing.. sounds awsome)


 

[themuffinman]

I need that album
Those lyrics are so distinct ...

[[BTF]adam]

hahaha theres a black dude called howaRD who is bald and is the front for Halifax bank..

[[BTF]adam]

Seether ft Amy Lee <------- so hot..

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

[[BTF]n0ctuary]

As an encore - MORE ANAL CUNT LYRICS!

6. I Noticed That You're Gay

i saw you buying a pearl jam record,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you hanging around in allston,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you riding around on your rollerblades,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you getting your tongue pierced,and i noticed that you're gay
i heard you spend all day on the internet,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you drinking a frappucino,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you wearing a fucking tree shirt,and i noticed that you're gay
you've got a tribal tattoo, and i noticed that you're gay

10. Mike Mahan Has Gingivitis

mike mahan has gingivitis [x4]
mike mahan [x4]


11. Trapped



12. You're A Fucking Cunt

you're fucking annoying and your band fucking sucks
your boyfriend's an idiot and you're a fucking cunt
you think you're so important an wan't everyone to suck up
i hope you o.d. and die real soon cuz you're a fucking cunt
15 year kids don't care about animal's and women's rights
but you force it down thier throats,cuz you're a fucking cunt
your writing's about as interesting as allen funt's
i hope you die,cuz you're a fucking cunt

you're,a,fucking,cunt

[repeat first 4 lines]

you're a fucking cunt [x4]


13. Phyllis Is An Old Annoying Cunt

you're a fucking cunt,you're old and dried up
you're a crusty old bitch, i hope you fucking die
you're an ugly bitch,you make me fucking sick
you're big fucking mouth,i'm sick of hearing it

[repeat first 2 lines]


14. A1 Stankus Is Always On The Phone With His Bookie

al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie

he's on the phone to puerto rico
he's on the phone to the dominican republic
he's always gambeling on college football games
he buys cards from tom lehman

al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie
al stankus is always on the phone with his bookie

he's on the phone to puerto rico
he's on the phone to the dominican republic
he's always gambeling on college football games
he buys cards from tom lehman


15. Bill Scott's Dumb

[chorus:]
bill scott's dumb [x4]

you were brought up in a nudist colony
and you're also adopted too
you wear those gay pink shorts
and your dog shits all over the floor

[chorus]

you,fell down the stairs,and your dog,licked your balls
you,have an awesome job,but you're,always broke
your girlfriend is ugly,your mustache is gay,your dog's fucking stupid,and
bill scott's dumb


16. Harvey Korman Is Gay

harvey korman is gay


17. You Fucking Break

you've got a fucking cleft palate-palate
and hair just like gene shalit-shalit
i wan't to hit you with a mallet
your teeth are parted to the side-side
you've got a lazy eye-eye
why don't you fucking hide
you're bowllegged and walk around like ray-ray
and skin just like m.j.-j
and you're so fucking gay
you hang around at barca's spa-spa
with a nose like jamie farr-farr
i wan't to hit you with my car

you fucking freak


18. Theme From Three Company

watch the t.v. show


19. Jeanine Jizm Is A Freak

[chorus:]
jeanine jizm is a freak

Seth never wrote lyrics for the verses. on one of the verses HE sang lyrics
from a "slinky" commercial. the other verse HE sang lyrics from a "barrelhead
root beer" commercial. during the slow part, HE just screamed stuff.


20. Everyone In Anal Cunt Is Dumb

is that scott and tim,or gilbert and lewis
i let them in the band,didn't know that they'd screw us
mike mahan had no brains,tim has no spine
fred's a fucking asshole,and paul would always whine

first we had a spic,a pollack,and a geek
who'll play guitar for anal cunt next week
seth's an alcoholic,tim can't play drums
everyone in anal cunt is dumb

fred had his hair in those stupid fucking braids
tim has a kid,but he never gets laid
john dyed his hair,so we kicked him out of the band
scott's got a dumb tattoo on his hand


21. I Just Saw The Gayest Guy On Earth

he hangs around in allston,he always wears a tree shirt
his favorite band is roadsaw,he hangs out at the model cafe
he hangs out with toxic narcotic,he's got a tribal tattoo
his best friend is joe bonni,he's got his eyebrow pierced
he has purple dreadlocks,he works at herrell's ice cream
he wears an "allston rock city" t-shirt,i hope you fucking die


22. Johnny Violent Getting His Ann Kicked By Morrisey

johnny violent's fucking gay [x3]
ultraviolence fucking sucks [x3]
morrissey's gonna kick your ass [x3]
i'm gonna catch you
johnny violent's fucking dead [x3]


23. Metamorphosis

you both wear glasses,you both have bad teeth
you both have bad dandruff,good fucking grief


24. I'm Sick Of You



25. Howard Wulkan's Bald

Howard Wulkan's bald
b-a-l-d bald


26. You're A Tready Fucking Pussy

you always talk behind my back,but when i see you,you want to shake my hand
when i see you ready to fight,you change your story like i knew you might
you grew up wanting to be just like me,but i'm not cool in your clique
anymore
i never changed with the trends like you did,so you're not allowed to like me
anymore
you always do whatever's fashionable,and you hate me cuz i don't
you want to be everyone's friend,and you hate me cuz i won't
you're defending someone you barely know,you're such a fucking homo