Author Topic: women rule! (Read 16438 times)

Daemia · « **on:** July 25, 2008, 05:13:26 PM »

You women will really appreciate this one!

A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub.

She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately. She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers. As he did, she gently caressed his full beard.

Are you the manager?" she asked, softly stroking his face with both hands.

Actually, no, he replied.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she
said, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

"I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender.

"Is there anything I can do?"

Yes.

"I need you to give him a message," she continued,
running her forefinger across the bartender's lip and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

What should I tell him? the bartender managed to say.

Tell him, she whispered, "There's no toilet paper, handsoap, or paper towels in the ladies room."

Art · « **Reply #1 on:** July 25, 2008, 11:31:22 PM »

Here, let me lick you clean.

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #2 on:** July 26, 2008, 11:08:35 AM »

Women can't play Quake 2. Their tits get in the way.

Women drivers...

ReCycled · « **Reply #3 on:** July 26, 2008, 06:49:49 PM »

I've always wondered if someone would do this....

|iR|Focalor · « **Reply #4 on:** July 26, 2008, 07:05:13 PM »

HAHA! AWESOME!!! I almost shit my pants!

Pr0c3550r · « **Reply #5 on:** July 26, 2008, 07:07:51 PM »

DWxchzrles · « **Reply #6 on:** July 26, 2008, 08:00:32 PM »

[BTF]Sigma · « **Reply #7 on:** July 26, 2008, 08:09:21 PM »

Oh man, priceless

Daemia · « **Reply #8 on:** July 27, 2008, 11:10:27 AM »

it wont let me DL'd it

everytime i click on it it brings me to the login page even though i AM logged in! arg...
funny though, every time i post a joke that insults or ridicules men how i get this type of reply haha... awe

[BTF]Sigma · « **Reply #9 on:** July 27, 2008, 12:16:00 PM »

Well duh!!

I thought the joke was funny but had someone done that in real life they'd get skinned.

Daemia · « **Reply #10 on:** July 27, 2008, 12:32:22 PM »

womens bathrooms in bars are SICK and we unfortunately have to sit

so that means we usually end up not going and walking out full bladder.... or cleaning it the best we can then piling layer after layer of paper on the seat. its SO FRUSTRATING...

i love this joke... I'd do it.

fuck it! its worth a beating LOL

[BTF]Sigma · « **Reply #11 on:** July 27, 2008, 04:08:35 PM »

Lay down some toilet paper. That's what guys do if we have to pinch a loaf in a public stall. It also helps to check if you have paper in the stall before you start.

Look before you leap. It also makes you wonder the mentality of the last person to go in there and not say anything after they finished using the last of the toiletries.

Meh. Hover, deal.

The Happy Friar · « **Reply #12 on:** July 27, 2008, 06:59:51 PM »

Quote from: Daemia on July 27, 2008, 12:32:22 PM

womens bathrooms in bars are SICK and we unfortunately have to sit so that means we usually end up not going and walking out full bladder.... or cleaning it the best we can then piling layer after layer of paper on the seat. its SO FRUSTRATING...

bars have women's bathrooms??? (i wouldn't know honestly...)

but just because we're telling jokes involving women (and this one's kinda relevant to my weekend...):

At an Irish wedding, everyone got drunk. The bride's and groom's families wrecked the reception hall fighting with each other. The police had to break up the fighting. The next week, both families were in court. The judge asked, "All right now, what happened?" Paddy rose and said, "Judge, I was the best man. I should explain what happened." "Go ahead, Paddy. Take the stand." Paddy explaned, "Per tradition, the best man got the first dance with the bride. After I finished my first dance, the music kept playing, so I danced a second song, and then the music kept going some more so I danced a third song. All of a sudden, the groom leapt over the table, ran to us, and gave the bride an unmerciful kick, right between her legs!" The shocked judge said, "By God, that must have hurt!" "Hurt?" replied Paddy, "He broke three of my fingers!" (al lowe's cyber joke list = awesome)

ReCycled · « **Reply #13 on:** July 27, 2008, 07:10:56 PM »

First woman on the moon...

ReCycled · « **Reply #14 on:** July 27, 2008, 07:20:27 PM »

And just to balance the silliness of both sexes...

Author Topic: women rule! (Read 16438 times)

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