The Cow & Penguin Corner with Waffles

[plastik]

also...big thing...if you want to see the brandings you will have to change the filenames to what the originals in your /cow folder are, unless you intend on configuring your q2 to use only the cow model.

[Waffle Whiffer]

Thanks  Plastik!  OOOOOOO Console ....... if you see this...... can you put them on the server? Please Please Please 

[QuakeDuke]

Ok ya'll. After much research in the cow fenom.. phenomme...feenom... aw heck, cow thingie world wide, I thought I'd share the following insights gained although it's a might long, it's, well, insightful...... 

PS. I appleogz..uh, aploijiz.. oh heck, say I'm sorry in advance for anyone who might think this to be discrimination, offensive or some other such thing - I certainly don't mean it to be...

If you have two Cows and you are:

DEMOCRATIC

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.


REPUBLICANISM

You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?


SOCIALIST

You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.


COMMUNIST

You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.


CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.


BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk
the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.


AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one, l ease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are
surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts
stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
Your stock goes up.


FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.


JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.


GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give
excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.


ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.


RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.


TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private
parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find
alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.


IRAQI CORPORATION

You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.


POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.


BE LGIAN CORPORATION

You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.


FLORIDA CORPORATION

You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally
vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you
think is the best-looking cow.


CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of cows.
They  make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegals.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.

--
                        -o)
                        /\\
                       _\_v

The penguins are coming...
        the penguins are coming...
http://www.pastorcharlie.net
----------------------------------

[cyberneticimplant]

here it is!  both the white cow and black cow branded.  the icon you usually see in the userinfo menu is altered aswell.  enjoy!   maybe i or one of you will see if this can be uploaded on the server, so everyone can see it.  also, which folder is the penguin in?  If it is wanted, i will brand that too.

note: just unzip these to your "baseq2/players/cow" directory.

Moooooo... I love it..... many thanks.....

I have my penguin stashed in /baseq2/players/penguin.

QD

Is that how Q2 recognizes models? By folder names?

[ReCycled]

Continuing cow theme.....Which reminds me - is there a 'penguin' model? There should be....

[Waffle Whiffer]

Continuing cow theme.....Which reminds me - is there a 'penguin' model? There should be....

You don't have the penguin model? We got to get it on the servers. It's pretty cool. It makes a mek mek noise and when it crouches, it moves arround on it's belly.

[ReCycled]

Well if there is a Penguin model, Fmax, post it here. Then we can start using it. I can see a vicious showdown between Cows and Penguins on Xatrix or Pygmy.....
 

[Waffle Whiffer]

OK, this is the penguin model.

Now, do I side with the cows or the penguins in "The Great COWs vs. PENGUINs Showdown".  Penguins are deffinitly a smaller target. You have to ask yourself "What would QuakeDuke do?"


Also, QD, can you repost your post above replaceing the word "cow" with the word "penguin". hehehehehe

[QuakeDuke]

Now, do I side with the cows or the penguins in "The Great COWs vs. PENGUINs Showdown".  Penguins are deffinitly a smaller target. You have to ask yourself "What would QuakeDuke do?"
Also, QD, can you repost your post above replaceing the word "cow" with the word "penguin". hehehehehe

QuakeDuke would run around with a bind switching from cow to penguin back to cow everytime he fire if he knew how to do such a thing which he don't and I've forgotten where the punctuation keys are on the keyboard so there

Here ya go Max...

Ok ya'll. After a lot of soul searching as to whether or not I should grant MaxMoo's request I have decided in favor of granting it - especially since KEdit has a great find/replace function

If you have two Penguins and you are:

DEMOCRATIC

You have two penguins. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. Barbara Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICANISM

You have two penguins. Your neighbor has none. So?

SOCIALIST

You have two penguins. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his penguin.

COMMUNIST

You have two penguins. The government seizes both and provides you with (whatever it is penguins provide ). You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.


CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two penguins. You sell one, buy a bull penguin, and build a herd of penguins.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two penguins. Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other (this I GOTTA see), and then pours the milk down the drain.


AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two penguins. You sell one, l ease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one. You force the two penguins to produce - whatever it is penguins produce - of four penguins. You are surprised when one penguin drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two penguins. You go on strike because you want three penguins. You go to lunch and drink wine. Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two penguins. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary penguin and produce twenty times whatever it is penguins produce.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains. Most are at the top of their class at penguin school.

GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two penguins. You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality whatever it is penguins produce, and run a hundred miles an hour. Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two penguins but you don't know where they are. While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman. You break for lunch. Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two penguins. You have some vodka. You count them and learn you have five penguins. You have some more vodka. You count them again and learn you have 42 penguins. The Mafia shows up and takes over however many penguins you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the penguins in Afghanistan, which are two. You don't milk them (aw shucks!) because you cannot touch any creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to produce whatever it is penguins produce but use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION

You have two penguins. They go into hiding. They send radio tapes of their mekking.

POLISH CORPORATION
 
You have two bull penguins. Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them (I KNEW it - I bet they use rail guns!).

BE LGIAN CORPORATION

You have one penguin. The penguin is schizophrenic. Sometimes the penguin thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish. The Flemish penguin won't share with the French penguin.  The French penguin wants control of the Flemish penguin's whatever penguins produce. The penguin asks permission to be cut in half.
The penguin dies happy.

FLORIDA CORPORATION

You have a black penguin and a brown penguin. Everyone votes for the best looking one. Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally
vote for the black one. Some people vote for both. Some people vote for neither. Some people can't figure out how to vote at all. Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking penguin.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of penguins. They  make real California cheese. Only five speak English. Most are illegals. Arnold likes the ones with the big (whatever is the penguin equivalent to) udders.

Wheee.... Mooooo...Mek! Mek!  Long live the Cow! Long live the Penguins!  Pencows!  Cowguins!.....

[Waffle Whiffer]

Yummy, I have to try some of that california penguin cheese.   

[Waffle Whiffer]

What do ducks like to eat with their cheese? ...............................................Quackers!

[PANTONE 7717C]

Okay since this is the cow & penguin corner I will post this here:)
I've made a new skin for that goofy penguin model as it seems some people still use that model. I just used the standard skin as a base and added some details (that green thing on its belly is a 'bfg-egg', or something;)

Right, have fun

[Waffle Whiffer]

 

New cow on da block.

[jägermonsta]

Isn't that a buffalo or something? Looks like it would make a nice blanket or rug.

[Waffle Whiffer]

Isn't that a buffalo or something? Looks like it would make a nice blanket or rug.

These are the