The sun god hates you

[|iR|Focalor]

Maybe this is why my ping sucks in the evenings.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/space/20090706/sc_space/thesunhasspotsfinally

According to the article, solar storms that struck in 1859 caused telegraph lines to spontaneously burst into flames. I'm not sure if I really believe that though. Imagine if some shit like that were to happen tomorrow. Everything you own would be reduced to smoldering cinders. Your house is wired for telecommunications... burned to the ground (along with our precious PC's, oh noes!). Your car wiring would explode. You know how expensive the main wiring harness in any vehicle costs these days? Let me put it this way: A company I used to work for had the engines stolen out of a few work trucks. In order to remove the motor, they had to cut the wiring harness. That alone was enough for the insurance company to declare it totalled.

I have a solution. Every country on the planet should start mass producing fire extinguishers and collecting them all from every company, private citizen, and even scavenging through landfills to find the ones that were thrown away. We'll send an army of space shuttles to bombard the sun with them. The heat of the sun will melt through the metal tanks releasing the carbon dioxide and thusly extinguishing the Sun permanently.

Now... if someone else would care to volunteer to create a solution as to what to do when our planet super-cools from not having a Sun.

Then... if someone else could figure out what to do when our planet begins flying out of orbit due to no gravitational pull from the Sun. God forbid if our planet were to crash into Mars. Maybe if we're really lucky it'll only hit France and Sweden.

[QwazyWabbit]

Well... errrmmm....

The fire extinguisher idea is a great one, we can bottle the CO2 and send it at the sun. I think we should use some kind of magnet gun to launch them though, it costs too much in rockets to lift them.

The CO2 won't put it out... it takes dry chemicals to put out fusion fires... it is after all, a Hydrogen fire and hydrogen is just a metal that thinks it's a gas.

As for the gravity thing... well, a cold sun is still a massive sun so the gravity would still be there and the earth would still suck.

[|iR|Focalor]

Well if scientists can pull theories from their anuses, so can I.

I hypothesize that once the sun is extinguished, it's gravitational pull will become 17,777,778.989 times stronger and our entire galaxy (as well as a few others that are closest to us) will collapse into the super dense void that used to be our sun.

But cockroaches will survive.

[UUD-40]

Just build a giant umbrella to make shade.

[|iR|Focalor]

Hmm, now there's an idea! We could contract Ray-Ban to make a giant UV filtering dome over the entire planet. They'd have to hire lots and lots and lots of people to help install it, which would help this worldwide unemployment problem we're having right now.

But then again, they'd only end up outsourcing the manufacturing to Taiwan and only hire illegal Mexicans to install it.

[The Happy Friar]

i'd say making a super-super sonic flying city would be most practicle.  Keep it zooming along to always stay on the dark side.

[|iR|Focalor]

You'd need a fuel source to power the propulsion. And solar powered boosters is obviously out of the question.

[The Happy Friar]

what if you had a satellite in a stationary position relative to the floating super-city that would beam down microwave energy?  I think that works in some version of SimCity, I forget.