Limericks

[HabibGoatAss]

There once was a fag with a rail
and oft he pad camped and impaled
with sad folly near pads
what a gay time he had
- his opponents could never prevail.

What a fag, do not camp, they complained
and did rant - for his death they campaigned
'til two nades neath his feet
caused his certain retreat
and from this pad camp, he refrained.

The morale of the story is thus
if you camp it is ever a plus
to move oft between kills
so your pad camping skills
are not stopped by two nades in the dust.

[DWxchzrles]

There one was a man from Peru,
Who dreamed of eating his shoe,
he awoke with a fright,
in the middle of the night,
and found that his dream had come true!

[|iR|Focalor]

There once was a noob from Peru
named zndkw1n, you know that it's true
I whipped out my shlong
so erect and so long
and shot him in the face with man-goo.

[DWxchzrles]

[HabibGoatAss]

Once did Habib work one store 
who refused ever mopping the floor
with no pride in his place
business was so disgraced
that no robber would darken his door.

How you are you are doing towards your self?
He did ask towards one man near the shelf
What for can I help you to find,
Have you now one thing now in the mind?
Habib asked, as he let out a belch.

With green jerky diminishing health
growing mold upon meat in deep stealth,
with a scratch down below,
electric hot-dog aglow
adding more to his mis-gotten wealth.
 
This customer he did quite displease,
with month-old kabobs and bad cheese,
food poisoning he thus gave
sending one to the grave,
n'er more for to Come Again Please.

Love,
Habib

[@ngeldust-CRU]

Lol..Habib..i din know u having the Afro hair

[[BTF]MangyMutt]

There once was a noob from Peru
named zndkw1n, you know that it's true
I whipped out my shlong
so erect and so long
and shot him in the face with man-goo.

lol Foc...you need counseling..

WOOF!

[|iR|Focalor]

There once was a noob from Peru
named zndkw1n, you know that it's true
I whipped out my shlong
so erect and so long
and shot him in the face with man-goo.

lol Foc...you need counseling..

WOOF!

As long as the counsellor wears a rain poncho and an OSHA approved face sheild, they should be safe.

There once was a Mangy ole Mutt
Who spied me as I busted a nut
he said to me, "GUY!
You got it in his eye!"
I say, "But none in his hair, so what?"
 

[peewee_RotA]

This customer he did quite displease,
with month-old kabobs and bad cheese,
food poisoning he thus gave
sending one to the grave,
n'er more for to Come Again Please.

That's the Best Limerick ever
Another so great I'll find never
Mine are all bores
I'll stick to robbing your stores
Too bad we can't all be so clever

[Chocobo Joe]

He's Popeye the sailor man
He lives in a frying pan
He turned on the gas
and burned off his ass
He's popeye the Sailor man! (toot toot)

Hehe, I remember that one from elementary school, only it was a bit different.

He's Popeye the sailor man
He lives in a garbage can
He turned on the heater
and burnt off his peter
He's popeye the sailor man

There was another one kids used to recite but I can only remember the first 2 lines of it.

Under the cherry tree
guess what she showed to me

Wow, how childish, LOL! And to think... Andrew "Dice" Clay would sell out huge arenas because of stupid shit like that.

It goes like this:

Under a cherry tree
She showed it to me
It was big and black
And had a crack
And looked like a forest to me

So I took out a banana
And stuck it up the crack
My girlfriend screamed
When she saw the cream
So I put the banana back

 

[DWxchzrles]

There once was a girl named Madonna
To all the boys she'd ask "Do yo wanna?"
Warren Beatty said no,
called her a "HO"
Now she cries and smokes marijuana.

[peewee_RotA]

A limerick fan from Australia

regarded his work as a failure:

his verses were fine

until the fourth line

[Th0m@s29]

That is just messed up lol.