Author Topic: JOKES  (Read 80305 times)

Offline ReCycled

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #75 on: January 08, 2008, 04:37:37 PM »
Some recent weddings....

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Offline Daemia

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #76 on: January 08, 2008, 07:18:03 PM »
 :lolsign: very nice find.  I love the wedding name bloopers.   wang-holder got me lol'ing
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Offline ReCycled

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #77 on: January 10, 2008, 06:52:12 PM »
Why dogs will sometimes turn on their owners....

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Offline |iR|Focalor

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #78 on: January 11, 2008, 05:13:58 PM »
Rodney Dangerfield one-liners and quips:
---------------------------------------------------


My favorite Dangerfield one-liner has always been:

"I'm so ugly... I went to the proctologist... he stuck his finger in my MOUTH!"

I've always liked this one too, but I'm pretty sure it's not a Dangerfield quote:

"I masturbate so often that when I actually DO have sex with a woman, I feel like I'm cheating on MYSELF!"

.... and one more....

"I used to be sexist... but bitches hate that shit."

« Last Edit: January 11, 2008, 05:25:29 PM by [EoM]Focalor »
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Offline jägermonsta

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #79 on: January 28, 2008, 06:55:08 AM »
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always lean towards war

Offline |iR|Focalor

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #80 on: February 04, 2008, 12:16:45 AM »
"SAMHAIN-THA!"

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Offline The Happy Friar

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #81 on: February 07, 2008, 07:45:31 AM »
It was the mailman's last day on the job. After 35 years of carrying
the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a fine box of cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful blond in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate sex he had ever experienced.

When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: Eggs, Hash-Browns, Ham, Sausage, Biscuits, Flap-Jacks, and fresh-squeezed Orange Juice.

When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you." He said, "Screw him...give him a dollar."

The blond then blushed and said, "The breakfast was my idea".
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Re: JOKES
« Reply #82 on: February 08, 2008, 01:25:15 AM »















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Offline ReCycled

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #83 on: February 08, 2008, 09:23:45 AM »
...
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Offline jägermonsta

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #84 on: February 26, 2008, 03:54:46 PM »
« Last Edit: February 27, 2008, 04:41:24 AM by jägermonsta »
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Offline [BTF]Sigma

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #85 on: February 26, 2008, 07:54:31 PM »
LMFAO at the DoucheBag site.

BWAHAHAHA
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Offline ReCycled

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #86 on: February 27, 2008, 06:42:07 AM »
"And yet, there's something beautiful there. Short machine-gun like rants. A chop chop cadence. Tone poetry brought to life with the short staccato rhythms and sing-song lyricisms of the working class proletariat. It's modernist absurdist 1920s Left Bank avant-gardism, a neo-Marxian cry wrapped in class culture backwash. Jorge Luis Borges dipped in Bunuel by way of pop inflected Beastie Boys hallucinogens and a dash of Andrew Dice Clay.

Or else it just sucks."

Lol....
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Offline |iR|Focalor

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #87 on: February 27, 2008, 09:20:50 AM »
The path of least resistance...
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Offline jägermonsta

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #88 on: February 27, 2008, 09:50:23 AM »
Autism speaks, just not very well.  :D
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Offline jägermonsta

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Re: JOKES
« Reply #89 on: March 27, 2008, 03:32:40 PM »
Rap represented in mathematical graphs and charts: http://www.jamphat.com/rap/:lolsign:
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It's a customization on our FFA servers allowing you to increase difficulty by reducing the damage you deal to opponents. Setting handicap 50 means your shots do half damage.

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