Author Topic: Fuck Chuck norris. (Read 5096 times)

Om3ga · « **on:** October 01, 2006, 12:33:45 PM »

Chuck Norris sucks dick for cab fare and then walks home.
   Chuck Norris' semen cures cancer. Too bad he has AIDS.
   Chuck Norris does not sleep. He passes out after two wine coolers.
   The chief import of Chuck Norris is cock.
   Chuck Norris shampoos with conditioner, and then actually repeats.
   Chuck Norris masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
   Chuck Norris once became popular for no apparent reason whatsoever.
   A Chinaman once told Chuck Norris that his penis was small during a karate tournament.
   Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.
   Chuck Norris' most lethal art is face painting.

Om3ga · « **Reply #1 on:** October 01, 2006, 12:35:06 PM »

# When Chuck Norris uses Verizon Wireless, you can't hear him now.

# Chuck Norris once burned his lips on the tailpipe of a car while trying to blow it up for a movie.

# Chuck Norris folds pocket aces pre-flop.

# Chuck Norris is the only person whom the Axe Effect Deodorant Spray will not work on.

# Chuck Norris bet on Poland in both World Wars.

# A shepherd once accidentally spilled his coffee on Chuck Norris' lap and refused to apologize. Chuck Norris went to the man's field and fucked every one of his sheep. Chuck Norris wasn't trying to get back at him; he just loves to fuck sheep.

# If you yell "Chuck Norris" into the Grand Canyon, it echoes back "is a pussy."

# Chuck Norris will fight you any time of the day. Except when "The View" is on.

# When the boogie man goes to sleep, he looks in his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck's ass is still sore from the last time he was found.

# During World War II Chuck Norris once tried killing a Nazi soldier by pointing his finger at him and yelling "Bang!"

# Many stuntmen who have worked with Chuck Norris complain on set that Chuck Norris makes far too many so-called jokes about "exchanging blows."

# Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting because hunting implies that you might kill something. Chuck Norris goes bird watching.

# Chuck Norris came up with the idea for his look after many years studying the Brawny paper towel man.

# Chuck Norris has 2 speeds. Hard and harder. He uses these when making love to other men.

# The leading causes of death in the United States are heart disease, cancer, and AIDS. Chuck Norris has all three.

# Chuck Norris doesn

Om3ga · « **Reply #2 on:** October 01, 2006, 12:46:11 PM »

# Chuck Norris once lost to Lance Armstrong in a sperm count.

# Chuck Norris

Om3ga · « **Reply #3 on:** October 01, 2006, 12:47:20 PM »

The Greatest hits!

# Chuck Norris is currently suing ABC, claiming Hope & Faith are trademarked names for his left and right breasts.

# Chuck Norris was the original choice to play the lead role in the movie, "Boys Don't Cry". Hilary Swank replaced him because test audiences found him to be gayer than 9 guys blowing 8 guys.

# Chuck Norris has no friends on Myspace. Not Even Tom.

# Chuck Norris once fought Vin Diesel... and got absolutely fucked up.

# Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because of their potency, silent because his butthole is extremely loose.

# Chuck Norris was born Chuck Stevens but took his wife's name when they were married.

# Chuck Norris has to employs a legion of Mexican landscapers to suppress the wilderness that is his back.

# Chuck Norris was once trapped in a paper bag for 3 days.

# Chuck Norris has 2 speeds. Hard and harder. He uses these when making love to other men.

# The leading causes of death in the United States are Heart Disease, Cancer, and AIDS. Chuck Norris has all three.

DWxchzrles · « **Reply #4 on:** October 03, 2006, 06:35:09 PM »

has chuck norris become the laughing stock

[BTF]Sigma · « **Reply #5 on:** October 04, 2006, 02:35:38 AM »

# Chuck Norris was born Chuck Stevens but took his wife's name when they were married

BWAHAHAH OWNED!!!

MyDocuments · « **Reply #6 on:** October 08, 2006, 05:58:47 PM »

ROFL

KobraKlaws · « **Reply #7 on:** October 08, 2006, 07:55:57 PM »

These are much better than the trite regular Chuck Norris jokes. This version is a lot better. Thanks for sharing them.

[BTF] Reflex · « **Reply #8 on:** October 08, 2006, 10:48:17 PM »

it's just as funny to me at either extreme...

Wheet · « **Reply #9 on:** October 13, 2006, 08:50:34 AM »

Chuck Norris wins.

Daemia · « **Reply #10 on:** October 13, 2006, 03:09:10 PM »

Chuck has always annoyed me,

but I like Jean Claude Van Dam

Om3ga · « **Reply #11 on:** October 13, 2006, 03:46:26 PM »

chuck is shit

jean is the shit

Bleach · « **Reply #12 on:** October 13, 2006, 04:13:30 PM »

he's still a ballet dancer

Om3ga · « **Reply #13 on:** October 13, 2006, 06:02:04 PM »

[answertowrittenquestion] whats the name of this topic ? [/answertowrittenquestion]

Th0m@s29 · « **Reply #14 on:** April 13, 2011, 02:42:30 PM »

Well to many insults after another towards this poor Chuck Norris character. Me and him were pretty close growing up together ya know.

Poll

fuck chuck norris ?

Author Topic: Fuck Chuck norris. (Read 5096 times)

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