Ye Religion Thread

[|iR|Focalor]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

[ex]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

I wonder if doing that would cure Golgo's ferrus cranus issue.

[|iR|Focalor]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

I wonder if doing that would cure Golgo's ferrus cranus issue.

There is no cure for Downs Syndrome.

[M^tster]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

I heard that if you kill a Focalor, they sometimes drop a "Pisces gem". Shall we try?

[|iR|Focalor]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

I heard that if you kill a Focalor, they sometimes drop a "Pisces gem". Shall we try?

Pick an answer:

a. Nah, that's just bullshit they tell suckers to fill pews and then collect 10% of their paychecks every week.

b. Actually... I'm a Taurus, and so is my 32 caliber revolver, so attempting to kill me might prove to be rather "hairy". I know you had your heart set on me being a Pisces, but alas there are other fish in sea, my darling.

[M^tster]

They say that jumping off a 40 story building while holding a Holy Bible will cure any disease. Faith without works is dead, bro.

I heard that if you kill a Focalor, they sometimes drop a "Pisces gem". Shall we try?

Pick an answer:

a. Nah, that's just bullshit they tell suckers to fill pews and then collect 10% of their paychecks every week.

b. Actually... I'm a Taurus, and so is my 32 caliber revolver, so attempting to kill me might prove to be rather "hairy". I know you had your heart set on me being a Pisces, but alas there are other fish in sea, my darling.

LOL I was talking in game silly, but a Taurus I am as well, but my 9mm is a highpoint, which is where I choose to be.      BTW a "Focalor" is a fish monster in the Final Fantasy Genre, which BTW seems to be a docile one amongst the rest of the group. And that Pisces Gem is what they drop. Sorry to ruin your analysis. 

[The Dreaming Dragon]

And final fantasy borrowed from a far older "game",the Lesser Key of Solomon...

Duke Focalor
 
Focalor (also Forcalor or Furcalor) is a powerful Great Duke of Hell, commanding three or thirty legions of spirits. Focalor is mentioned in The Lesser Key of Solomon as the forty-first of the 72 goetic demons. According to the grimoire: Focalor appears in the form of a man with a griffin's wings, kills men, drowns them, and overthrows warships; but if commanded by the conjurer he will not harm any man or thing. Focalor has power over wind and sea, and had hoped to return to heaven after one thousand years, but he was deceived in his hope.
 
One of the three archdemons, Lucifuge Rofocale, has his second name as an anagram of Focalor, implying an intellectual relationship.

and here is the rest of the Monster Manual:   http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lesser_Key_of_Solomon#The_72_Demons

LOLOLOL and speaking of Dungeons and Dragons references...here is High Comedy!

http://videosift.com/video/Chick-Tract-Dungeons-and-Dragons

I once wrote Chick publications and tole them I was a janitor in a highschool interested in converting the kids from their sinful ways. They sent me a HUNDRED tracts! And they went right into the garbage. Halleluiah!

[|iR|Focalor]

[The Dreaming Dragon]

http://videosift.com/video/Inside-a-Scientology-Marriage

[quadz]

http://videosift.com/video/Inside-a-Scientology-Marriage

So many similar stories at the Ex Scientology Kids site.

Some I've read so far:

http://exscientologykids.com/lily.html
http://exscientologykids.com/eskforums/viewtopic.php?t=166
http://exscientologykids.com/RQPD.html
http://exscientologykids.com/spawn.html

More:

http://exscientologykids.com/storiesindex.html

[The Dreaming Dragon]

Nah
Scientology is for Pussys! A R-E-A-L religion grabs you,brainwashes you and convinces you to blow yourself up and that it's somehow a good idea.

Awww! You had to scrub toilets and push pamphlets for a few days straight. Boo - fuckin'- hoo. You ain't turning yourself into a brief rain of body parts so the rest of your family doesn't follow you into martyrdom if you don't,yet somehow knowing they'll hit the Afterlife Lottery doing so. And I wonder if outwardly all the players in the Construct-o-Bomber factory who indoctrinate and propel these poor backward peasants like torpedos to sink Sanity,and basicly anyone not Them and Not What makes Them Profit...do these people,and the families these kids are taken from,pay a sort of lipservice to the "religious" side of it,but inside wink and nudge at the transaction,unspoken understandings that like the despots before them these kids are dying to promote the faction in charge or at large. Purely political,and as oppressive and familiar as anything you'd find in History. You're a Peasant,you're Expendable,and THIS is how we will Spend your Life. Or do they...get into it

Do they Believe it all...the Hard Sell Islam? Do Islamist Males want to BREED MORE Males so they'll have enough to toss one occasionally at the Cause?Can being a vital part of the Ultimate Victory of Allah PRAISE BE HIS NAME and fly into bits with a song in your heart because you earned a place in His Merciful Embrace? And do the parents fall on their knees   swooning to see their little boy or girl will forever honour their name and be accredited unto the sacred texts? I view this thought with subtle horror,and realize that their world is not mine. Life is lost with a numb casualness in those rocky wastes. Riots and famines and gassings and disease  and just being in the wrong place and time in a hail of random violence. All the time. To this Western World its inconceivable how often and how horrid Death happens,and its been going on for Thousands of Years. So a Father may be comforted with the fact that Blowing Up is far more kindly a Death than most that could claim his kid,so he may excuse the loss,knowing that child will be in Paradise. Or the rest of the family may gain favour with Allah and his friends with the AK-47s.

I'm pretty sure that the parasites that do the whammy and get the kids Drunk on their Majesty of Allah don't believe a Damn Thing about Allah. Or is it that I'm hoping that? Believing in your own lies helps you to convince others. Where poor children are a marketable resource,how much rationality does it demand to get this lumbering beast called Islam to trod ahead by a constant sacrifice of Human Souls? I sit here wondering if they would use their OWN kids to further fragment the social order , splattering in some downtown mall? I assume Not,the powerful don't let such things happen,but a Fanatic would. Where do their loyalties lie,in the Cause or the Other Cause?  Political tactics or religious honor? Or is it different to each participant? As I've said,I find it unfathomable: believing in Anything that wants ME to blow myself up let alone take as many innocents with me as possible. A God cannot work that way. People in these lands know life is Bad for them(when was the last time your neighbor was eaten by wolves?) so the NEED of a happy Afterlife is a strong one,and by that desire are insnared by crafty manipulators who want a New World Order with the same standard of living as the Flintstones. Expose the firmest True Believer to Western Culture,and they are all Jack Daniels and Lapdances.And funnily enough,if they are going to go out and be Mohammed's Smart Missile the next day,the Clerics smile and wink at it all...knock yourself out tonight,boys. Just knock yourself out in the morning. Morality I can take off like a Hat is an attractive concept to sell Islam. 76 virgins and frontrow seats to everything! Indulgences. At least you got an autograph from the Pope if you paid for one in the Catholic church. Up to FOUR WIVES? SIGN ME UP! Quarterly Head Pah-raise Da Lawd!

Unfathomable. At least to me. All you knuckleheads with this -this THING you all have for Gods with Rules to 'Em!  Or real interest in YOU. Vanity? Or a Being with all the time in the world is simultaniously tuning in to all the cable channels of our lives? God as a Personal Interaction with you,coordinating his manipulations across the spectrum of every other life within its interface,like a server would an MMO?  All are Fleshpuppet Avatars to your consciencenesses are you not? A participatory fiction,a MUD ;for it Is Written! An oporating systems smeared over with a malaise of physics the Hard Drive and CPU of Creation. Logical. Functional. Arbitrary. Has no opinions,tallies no score. What one does Matters within this world,yet one could play the game frivilously,or badly,or simply Grief the other players for their jollies. The Oporating system does not judge,merely enables the drama to be played out as it sees fit. I can see a Creator watching the interplay of the pieces on His Screen,pausing us to read our Stats,tweak us a bit and release us to see what we do. Because He doesn't know...not really. Sort of the Point of the whole thing:inject matter into this dimension and see what happens,and Life  on Earth a happy byproduct of the processes set in motion. All automatic and nothing personal.

(I'll continue this later...need to do some drawing tonight!)

[quadz]

http://www.wisdomofchopra.com/

"It has been said by some that the thoughts and tweets of Deepak Chopra are indistinguishable from a set of profound sounding words put together in a random order, particularly the tweets tagged with "#cosmisconciousness". This site aims to test that claim! Each "quote" is generated from a list of words that can be found in Deepak Chopra's Twitter stream randomly stuck together in a sentence."

[The Dreaming Dragon]

And speaking as Reality as a Game Server ,here is a Link to Grand Coincidence!

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/6021-Spec-Ops-The-Line

 

http://www.wisdomofchopra.com/

"It has been said by some that the thoughts and tweets of Deepak Chopra are indistinguishable from a set of profound sounding words put together in a random order, particularly the tweets tagged with "#cosmisconciousness". This site aims to test that claim! Each "quote" is generated from a list of words that can be found in Deepak Chopra's Twitter stream randomly stuck together in a sentence."

I did something similar as a kid on my Atari 400 trying to teach myself Basic I made a program that would dip into randomized wacky phrases of strange things and stranger actions. So you'd get "TickledDick the janitor-wants to fondle-a busfull of Nuns." Or "God wants to buttfuck Mothera." Very simple,and I often thought of expanding the concept into a far more complex Narrative structure that would be made from sentance fragments,yet have an overarching Plot,as earlier results from the randomization process would govern the available choices in the next bunch of sentances. All would be a web of connections to the data pool of ideas,different pools for different outcomes. You would have a dozen different beginnings,each with random aspects to the situation to enhance the experience,say the Main Character has some governing trait,like Phenominal Luck or Startlingly Beautiful,and these influence the choices...wow. It would be a Random Novel generator:an essencially single person RPG where the interactions of the Characters the Reader has no control of,but it would be a different situation each time,and the "gameplay" expressed entirely as prose text. It'd be a Killer AP for these Kindles and such. And I can visualize the flowchart of it,and its internal logic. The Reader is in effect watching someone play a senario  out with no direct input,but possibly some control over the type of story that would unfold for it.Why not let the Reader choose stats for its "player" then let it loose in the world of its player's choosing  ,or just let Randomness rule?As a product it would sell like hotcakes! Stories can be saved and freely distributed since its only text,so you'd get a filesharing community from it. I hope somebody here can use this idea....but I have another one,merely smaller.

Since I am getting a webcomic website up and running,I think I would like some Oracle that spouts random Predictions or Fortunes based on a few lines of text tossed together from a set of datapools in a sequence structurally sound gramatically.and I would have easy to fill data lines to write up all these clumps of raw ideas.And maybe a way I can add and alter the framework of what is tossed ultimately onto the screen.But I won't get too nuts initially,and doing it would be an education in itself,and an introduction to the RPG scale of it...and I have a thought:

Daggerfall is nearly freeware,it is a fully fleshed out RPG,what if the main character was an AI navigating the world with a randomly generated set of agendas and circumstancesas a gameplay Mod,or even just retain the whole game itself as a backdrop and let the actions and outcomes of the player character interacting with his enviorment,and instead of squandering computing power with graphics,have all that happens told as a story. The underlying Math Systems would dictate the action,maybe with some combat tweaking to only mention an attack has a sufficiant amount of damage. So the effectiveness of the blow can be described,like a Critical Hit system. Like in the Heroes of Might and Magic series,you can participate in sacking a town or other enemy,or you can just see the results of a completely random battle. And you can have More stuff going on with an overarcing AI system where each NPC has complex agendas and run about getting them realized just like the player character.And the "plot" would evolve from the interaction of these factions and the player character must navigate through the labyrinth to achieve his own goals. In Skyrim there is an ecosystem where Foxes eat Rabbits and Bears eat foxes and the wildlife are aware and fight each other.These factions would have their own ecosystem among themselves and how they feel about other factions. The player need not be informed of every action of everything,just those he stumbles across,but behind the scenes all NPCs are interacting as if the player was watching.And at critical junctures,the "plot" can be accelerated at random times for random times,the player immune to all events but the factions left to move their part in the scheme of things further on. A Priest learns a new ritual,a nemisis finds a new weapon. A stronghold raided,an assassination rocks the government. And their individual AI can be sophisticated,nuanced in its personality and abilities. Opiniated,and with small histories that can be the basis of these opinions:Orc #5634372 was a Bounty Hunter,and so Hates Enemy Faction +10 and has a random Secret that influences the reactions to its world.A Perk system! Maybe the Fallout engine would be better suited to this idea?

What do you think? And can anyone help me with the Oracle? A random prediction with every push of the button?

[quadz]

WWJD? 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLphfq_g0kw

[Barton]

Funny (at least to me) propaganda cartoon: http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1054/1054_01.asp