I'd seriously consider enduring the fires of hell than live another day of my life as it is now.
Quote from: [TC]Granny on December 18, 2006, 03:41:49 AMit's the same 1 u seen the error for before
it's the same 1 u seen the error for before
well you haven't left yourself many options, butI'd recommend that you find something to give a shit about.It need not be yourself, or someone else or any object in particular.Just find 1 thing that you like about life and all of the opportunities that it provides us withand hold on to that 1 thing.It really helps if it's not something entirely physical or someone else, as these can easily be taken from you by the jackasses in this world.Find something that really makes you feel like you matter, if even in the tiniest way.Even if you aren't happy with your life or yourself or your peers, you will at least have1 good thing to think about when the world seems so full of shitty things.(as it does quite often)you can use this one thing to fight back the nasty thoughts that permeate your head in these crappy times. drive them back with the happiness that your 1 thing gives you.With the shit beaten back, it will just be you and your reason for living.some people find a creative outlet for their energy/hatred/unhappiness to pour intolike art and music and even gaming.others find a destructive way to cope with all the bad things that come their wayand break and smash things to aleviate their feelings of helplessness. (gaming helps here too)considering that you probably don't want to perpetuate the shitty parts of your life and/orpass them on to others, the positive creative outlet option may be more helpful.when I can't stand the way that people act and the stupid things they do that bring me down,I go out and I do my best to admire how beautiful the natural world is.Even though we take it for granted and we try to strip it of all value, the world we live in (-humans)is an exquisitely designed masterpiece of living and inanimate things that work in nearly perfect harmony.I look at the blades of grass in my yard and I listen to the sounds of wind brushing against leavesand birds trying their darndest to get some.When it's really been a shitty day, I pound a couple shots of bourbon down and go work in my garden.I try and pour a bit of my vitality into something that would not have even lived without my help. Every little bit of green in my yard was planted and nurtured by my actions and just seeing how farsome time and effort will go to help another living thing survive makes me feel so much better.I find that looking at all of the life that thrives around me, gives me a much more stable view of myplace on this planet. I can't make anything truly amazing happen by sheer force of will and even with yearsof effort I'll probably never be able to change the things that piss me off the most;but the thing I can do, no matter what, is attempt to enjoy the tiny bit of life that I get to have and try to make the tiny bits of life that others are blessed with just a smidgen better than normal.Unfortunately, I don't know you from Eve and I can't make a suggestion that is any bettersuited to your needs. You know your life better than anyone else and you'llhave to be the one to find your way. Some things can't be taught and others shouldn't be,but if there were a way to give every person a sense of purpose for just a second,I'd do it... consequences be damned!Life is really fucking tough and people are generally quite weak by comparison.Our only real advantage is that we can help each other to overcome the tough shit.Let us know if there is a way we can help you feel better in any way.
Testing, testing, 1, 2. <3 ya alice, cheer up. (Not a novel of a post. Just some words of encouragement from your friendly neighborhood randypants.)
Hi Mya/Alice,Just want to say that it only gets better as you get older. Yeah, yeah, that sucks and it's lame and doesn't help you out right now, but nothing but the passage of time and you getting to be your own person will truly help. One of my favorite sayings--can't remember what its origin is, but it has a vaguely Biblical ring to it--is "this, too, shall pass." I first heard this from my oldest brother, 13 years my senior, when I was in your age and in a similar funk for what I'm guessing are similar reasons. It has become a bit of a mantra for me, no matter the mood, as a reminder to get neither too high nor too low.In our ludicrously immature, juvenile culture, adulthood is grossly underrated. Fuck that--I treasure every second of it, every second I have no one to answer to but myself. That comes with all sorts of complicating issues, but ultimately I can do whatever the fuck I want (as long as I'm willing to pay the consequences), and the decision is entirely MY OWN. Just today, in fact, my wife and I didn't do JACK SHIT that was productive in any way, and there was NO ONE around to tell us we were pieces of shit for that. It fucking RULES!!!In the meantime, you can content yourself with this thought, perhaps: as long as you're a minor, you're shielded to a large extent from adult responsibilities, such as mortgages, creditors, and the like. You're probably not contemplating selling a treasured possession to pay a utility bill (see my posting in the "I lost control this weekend" thread), etc., etc. The suck side is that you have to put up with parental bullshit.But again, that too shall pass...
I just want to make them proud of me. but I don't want them controlling every aspect of my life. it's also a pain to deal with them because they never let me leave the house to do anything. I've never felt the need to go out and do stuff though because I'm so used to staying indoors. Plus, I don't really have any friends that are willing to do stuff with me, besides Jenn. I've stayed so long inside that I actually PREFER alonetime with my computer over going out (unless it's with Jenns). Sad, huh?Plus, my parents would 'prefer' for me to marry a Chinese guy. So I'm wondering, uhh.. Why can't I decide for myself? do I /really/ have to pick a specific race to fall in love with?? So I've asked them many times about it and finally settled on it. They believe it would be best to hook up with someone that knows Chinese to some extent, or is willing to learn. and familiar with the culture. That way the poor guy won't be COMPLETELY lost when dealing with my relatives. =] I just know if he's not Chinese, he'll be in for it. At least I'll know he truly loves me if he's willing to deal with my parents.
I"m not sure what this obsession with evidence is